Stop the Helicoptering!

Whats the matter with people these days?

Has our society become such Helicopter Parents that our kids should be wrapped in bubble wrap?

This article appeared in my local paper on Sept 1.

CHARLESTON, W.Va. – Elementary school playgrounds in one West Virginia county are losing their swing sets.Swings are being removed from Cabell County schools in southern West Virginia in part because of lawsuits over injuries.Cabell County schools safety manager Tim Stewart said Wednesday that a lot of parents are accusing him of being un-American, but he says the cost of maintaining a safe surface is too expensive.Stewart says a lawsuit in the past year involved a youngster who broke his arm jumping off a swing like Superman. It was settled for $20,000.Other equipment such as monkey bars will remain. Stewart says the schools are able to maintain the proper protection underneath them.

Are you kidding me? Someone actually sued because their child fell and broke their arm?

Isn't falling off a swing a part of childhood ritual? If my parents sued every time I or my brothers fell and hurt ourselves, we would of been RICH.

Whats the matter with these people?

While I think that some of the things we did as kids we shouldn't of, such as riding a bike without wearing a helmet, there have got to be some LIMITS to how much we coddle our kids!

If we continue to baby our kids, they will never learn their own limits.

Like swinging on a swing. "Ok, the last time I was swinging, I didn't hold on tight enough and I fell and broke my arm. This time I know to hold on tight."

Instead this kid is thinking, "its the schools fault I hurt myself, it wasn't my fault. I can continue to do it like I did before, because it gave my parents lots of money, and it wasn't my fault"

If you never let your kid fall and get hurt, how will they know how far is to far?

Be there to kiss the booboo, but then send them on their way!

What kind of adults are these coddled kids going to turn in to?

When I was a child I had a cousin that lived with her grandparents. This cousin was not allowed to have friends over (they might be mean to her), she wasn't allowed to go to friends houses (who knows what the child's parents might do to her), she wasn't allowed to come to the park with us (she might fall and get hurt), she wasn't allowed to talk on the phone (she might hear something that the g-parents couldn't). She wasn't allowed to date (she could of gotten pregnant), if she was wronged in anyway it was always someone elses fault. Basically this girl grew up smothered under her grandparents care.

What happened then when she turned 18, and actually left the house for the first time?

She married the VERY first guy she looked at within weeks of meeting him, started drinking, using drugs, got divorced, married the very next guy she looked at within weeks of meeting him, had a child, got divorced, married yet another guy within DAYs of meeting him, now they are divorcing, and we have lost all touch with her.

She is not even 30.

If her grandparents had allowed her to go places, experience life, have friends, learn how to talk and communicate with peers, learn from her mistakes, and have a safe place to come home to, I bet more than anything she would not have turned out like the adult she has become.

She is the way she is now because she never learned any limits. When she was free of her grandparents she didn't know how to control herself. The sky was the limit for her. Now she is bouncing all over the place with no control or understanding of how to stop.

I hope she does learn to control herself.

Before she ends up dead.

Parents!! You HAVE to give your kids breathing room. Let them figure things out on their own. Offer advice, don't do it for them. And STOP STOP STOP blaming every other thing around them when they fail. They can not learn success if they don't fail!

And DO NOT take away my children's right to swing on a swing just because your kid broke their arm. Take them to a DR, get it set, and let them swing again.

Have I made my point?

Summers Over

Dang, it has just been too long since I posted.

I've been busy! What can I say!?

I am a mom who had 3 kids home for summer vacation after all!

Actually we had a great summer and I am already missing it. It just goes by too fast.

I am not one of those moms that want her kids to be in school. I like them home.

I enjoy watching them, playing with them and going places with them.

Boy did we ever go places this summer!

I mean WOW!!

Hubby works all around the state, so summer time is a great time to do the traveling with him.

He has a Hotel reward system and because he is now a Platinum member, we get FREE upgraded rooms. Totally free! And totally upgraded!

Every time we check in, its an automatic upgrade to a suite. Or the biggest room they have.

And some of the rooms have been HUGE!

One place must of been close to 1000 ft.

We always stay right on the ocean too. There is nothing like waking up and looking out your window onto the beach and opening your balcony and listening to the waves.

AAAHHH Bliss!

But, back now to reality. School is back in session. No more traveling with the hubby.

Back to having to clean our rooms myself. Boooooooo

Ok, so I am going to try and keep this blog updated more often.

Really!

Happy birthday!

Holy cow its been awhile since I have written. I am usually better about that.
Its been so busy this last month or two.
After the graduation we went several places with Hubby. Like Gainesville where we tubed down a beautiful river.
Then a long time friend of ours came out for 3 weeks. He is the same age as my daughter. I used to cut his hair, his dads, and his brothers. I met them when he was 2! Now he is 18. The father and us are close friends.
We showed him as much as we could of Florida. Springs, the Atlantic ocean, the Keys, Miami, Delray Beach, Cocoa Beach.
He had a blast. We had a blast.
Even tho he is 18, he got along with my boys so well. They played like brothers. Of course he has known them all their lives, and before we moved here he and his brother were over alot. So they've grown up together.
And no, there is no romance between the teens. They have known each other since 2, and feel like brother sister, not boyfriend girlfriend.
But that didn't stop the BF from getting jealous. It was pretty fun to all of us except my daughter and the BF. she didn't want to upset him. And he played right into that.
Oh well. Too bad for him. LOL
Today is my sons 9th bday.
Crazy that he is 9 already!
We are getting him a Super Mario Brothers Game. And a hamster. Ugh. Yes, a real hamster.
He has been asking for his own pet. We got our daughter 2 hamsters about this age, and then she brought home another girl from school. Oops. guess what? It wasn't a girl. The next thing we knew we had 2 litters. We couldn't find enough people to take them before more litters were born. At one point we had 17! it was awful!
Then our cats came to the rescue. I do not know how they did it, but they somehow got into a cage and the next morning we had little hamster pieces every where. A head here, a tail there, a butt here. It was gross. But we only had several hamsters left after that. We finally were able to get rid of the rest. We were DONE with them!
This time I told hubby that we are getting only ONE.
The cats will enjoy having a 'toy' to look at. We will just make sure we have a very secure door.

To Go or Not To Go?

To go or not to go?
That is todays question.
Go where?
Why Harry Potter of course!
We have annual passes to Universal.
As we have for the last 3 years.
We rarely go in the summer time when its full of tourists. I mean why stand in a line in the heat and humidity to ride a ride that any other time of the year we can just walk right on to?
But this is HARRY POTTER we are talking about!!
If we hadn't of been out of town and busy the last 2 weeks we would of gone. They had soft openings so we had a good chance of being able to go in.
Tomorrow they are opening the parking lot at 5:30am. I suppose we could get near there about 4am. We have a good chance of being one of the first several thousand.
But do we want to??
Or should we wait until Oct when all the tourists are gone and we wont have to fight the throngs of people.
But its HARRY POTTER!!!!
Ugh! What to do?

Summer Vacation! Yay!

I survived! We all did!
Actually it went really well. Everyone got along, we laughed, giggled, reminisced, and talked about the future.

My daughter was so beautiful in her cap and gown. I felt like I was glowing right along with her.
To see your child accomplish her high school years with relatively little scratches, is such a great feeling. She never got involved in drugs, or lost friends. Had one breakup that was painful for her, but not so much that she couldn't deal with it. She got good grades, made lots of friends, grew into a bright, responsible, and beautiful woman.
I am proud to call her my daughter!

My gramma took my 3 year old niece with her to AZ. My niece will get to see her parents, my parents, her gramma, great grandparents, godparents, cousins, and family friends.
I am sure she is going to have the time of her life.
I am a little afraid of how spoiled she will be when she comes back home. I can't imagine that with all those grandparents that she won't be spoiled. In fact, since I know every single grandparent, I am positively confidant that she will be spoiled rotten.
It may be a culture shock for her when she comes back here.
For now, for us, its a culture shock not having her here! Its soooo quiet... No Dora on, or Diego. No Sesame Street muppets singing ABC's.
Weird.
By the time its no longer wierd, she will be home.

Today is the last day of school for my boys! Yay!!!
Now we get to travel with hubby to all kinds of fun places.
This weekend we are going tubing. I saw the pictures in our local newspaper and it looks beautiful. I am very excited.
We couldn't do it before since my niece can't swim yet. But my boys can, and I will be buying them lifejackets today, because even good swimmers can have issues in unfamiliar places, like a fast moving creek.
My daughter and her BF may even drive up and go with us.

I can remember my mom dreading summer vacation. "you kids home all day, underfoot, arguing who gets what toy, I can't stand it. Give me year round school!"
Maybe I shouldn't 'quote' that, but its phrases I heard all my school years mixed into one sentence.
Then on the first day of school she would be doing Happy Dances.
I'm sure of it.
Not me.
I love it when my kids are home. They really don't argue about things. I love hanging with them, and playing with them. Or just simply listening to them and being fascinated by their imaginations at work.
They get to stay up late, and sleep in.
Yes, they do sleep in. I am lucky in that way.
No more struggling with homework times.
Although I do have a huge book of school work for each of them that they have to complete by the end of summer.
I do not want them to fall behind because their heads will be filled with all the fun we will have.

Summer Vacation.... Here we come!!!!! Yay!!!

I'm nervous.
My X inlaws are coming.
Oh, and my X.
And my gramma.
They are coming for my daughters graduation from high school.
I can't believe she is graduating. The time just doesn't seem like its possible that she is already that age.
Anyway,
her dad and his mom, brother, brothers girlfriend, and my gramma are coming.
Nobody is staying with us. Which is good, because we really don't have the room.
I mean we do... But it would require shuffling around. I'm sure they all much prefer to have a hotel room anyway. In fact, my gramma, xMIL, xspouse are sharing a suite.
Thank God we they all get along!

We they really do!
Do you get along with your X?
Now if we did not have kids, I would have no care either way about remaining friendly. It would be on a individual base.
But when you have kids, you want your kids to grow up in the best enviroment possible. And if that marriage does not have that kind of enviroment, a div0rce is often the healthiest choice.
Thats how it was with my X.
We married young and quickly. I was barely 18, he 21. We got pregnant almost immediately. We pretty much knew at that time that we could be great friends, but we were just not compatible as husband and wife. Something we would of discovered had we of taken our time.
I don't regret that at all. I never would of gotten pregnant with our daughter if we would not of married.
When we decided that we were better off apart, we approached it with a realistic idea of how to best raise a child despite not living together.
Rule 1. NEVER EVER EVER talk bad about your X. At least where the child can hear, or to someone that can/will repeat it to your child. Your child is Half You, and Half the X. Everything you say about the X, the child will see it as a reflection on themself.
Rule 2. Realize how you conduct yourself around the X. Be friendly, if even business like. Treat the x respectifully. You don't have to act like best buddies. But by making the drop offs with as little to no stress as possible, the child doesn't feel in the middle of a battle.
If both parents followed these two very basic rules, a divorce would be a new beginning for all involved rather than an emotional baggage to be carried for years.

Alrighty then,
off my soap box!
So, yes I'm a bit nervous. So is hubby. We've had them over in the past, years ago when we lived near them. But there was usually lots of other family around.
I'm sure it will be fine. My xmil is one of the sweetest people you'd ever know. I truly adore her.
My bil is a nice guy, although I do have to admit that I never got to know him. He is my age, but we never had much in common, and never hung out other than family functions.
My x is an all american nice guy. He has had some health issues to overcome the last few years, but he seems to be well.

It will be a fun weekend. I'm sure of it.
Right?!

I'm a PROUD mommy!!

I am one PROUD mommy right now!
All my kids are doing great in school!
The 2 Seniors start their colleges in Aug.
One going to UCF for a bachelors in Hospitality
the other signed up for beauty school.
The 8 yr old scored over and above what we feared
and can now go to 4th grade.
The 6 yr old loves to read and is very good at it.
He is a perfectionist with his work.
The 3 yr old is learning how to write her name.

School is out next week! Can't wait!
Hubby is traveling alot and we are going with him.
The 3 year old is going to visit my parents and her parents as well as a ton of other relatives for 3 months. It will be so weird not to have her here.
The boys and I love traveling with Daddy. They are all great car riders.
Of course, we bring DVDs, DS's and etc so its not like a big deal to them.
I read to hubby. I enjoy that. It makes my time go by faster,
it makes him enjoy driving more. And it gives us something to discuss
once we finish.
We read the entire Harry Potter series this way.
Also the Twilight series. That was just this past year on our car trip from CA to WA.
and lots of trips around FL this year.

Yay! Kids are heading forward in school, and its SUMMER TIME!!!! yay!!!!